As war grows, those who want peace for Israelis and Palestinians face harrowing test

Next week's scheduled peace event in hilly Latrun, Israel, had been nine months in the making. It was supposed to be a gathering of global diplomats and dozens of longtime Israeli and Palestinian peace activists working toward finding common ground. An even bigger peace talk was planned for next month about 24 miles outside Jerusalem.

Then terror struck. Hamas militants conducted a surprise attack Saturday by rushing a border fence and killed hundreds of Israelis in their homes and on the streets, as well as some attending an outdoor music festival.

In the days since, Israeli troops have launched large-scale airstrikes in pursuit of Hamas in the region. The rising deaths and destruction have further complicated the strain between Israelis and Palestinians, with the conflict claiming at least 2,700 lives on both sides.

The unfathomable tragedy has now left some peacebuilders in the Gaza Strip and in the U.S. either vowing to double down their efforts or struggling with what will they do next.

"This is a test of our resiliency. It's, it's more than that. This has shaken us to our very core," said John Lyndon, executive director of the Alliance for Middle East Peace, a fast-growing coalition of about 170 organizations worldwide working towards peacebuilding, especially among the Israelis and Palestinians.

Lyndon, who spoke by phone from Paris, said his group is still hoping to support others working to promote peace in the region, even if the peace talks his group had planned in Latrun will no longer happen.

But for others who work on Israeli-Palestinian relations, the war has raised questions about whether peace is a realistic outcome in the region.

Despite her optimism, the bloodshed has Shiri Ourian in pain and raising some doubts. Ourian is the executive director of the New York-based American Friends of the Parents Circle - Families Forum, a joint Israeli-Palestinian nonprofit organization of 700 families who have lost a loved one in the conflict.

"It has made me think, 'Do we really mean what we say?'" Ourian said. "I think everyone is struggling right now. We're all asking ourselves, 'What does it mean to be a peacemaker?'"

'Violence isn't the alternative'

For Ourian, this past week has been full of "unimaginable sadness" and uncertainty as the battle rages along the Gaza Strip.

She said despite their collective grief, the nonprofit's staff organized a joint Zoom meeting between its Palestinian and Israeli members just a day after the attacks began.

The meeting, Ourian said, went "back to the basic essence" of why the organization was formed.

"Just listening to the other side, bearing witness to the pain of what each other is going through," Ourian said. "Having these joint meetings through such atrocities, that ‘enemies’ can come together in a room, their experiences, how they are feeling and recommit to the values of the organization."

Ourian said there were some tense and difficult moments, especially when the subject of violence arose.

"The sad and profound truth is there is no military solution to this conflict," Ourian said. "We must center our humanity first. We must show love for each other and our commitment to a better future, a joint better future with freedom and dignity for all."

Ourian said while her group remains committed, there is unfortunately "a lot of fear" as they know what's likely to come next, more bereaved families on both sides.

"Everyone feels beyond frustrated with this sense of great, great loss," Ourian said. "We know deep down inside that violence isn't the alternative."

'Peace is something messy, it’s fragile, harder to maintain'

Attempting to make peace in relative times of quiet is challenging enough, said Eliza Mayo, deputy director of The Arava Institute for Environmental Studies, an organization located at Kibbutz Ketura on the Israeli side of the Arava Valley.

But now with a war in the region, it will be far from business as usual at the academic and research institute that teaches a select group of students from Israeli, Palestinian, African, European and American backgrounds among others, all working together to improve the climate, Mayo said.

There are harsh realities to face, however. Some Israeli students are now on reserve duty and some Palestinian students with family members in Gaza aren't as focused on the next wastewater treatment or off-grid technologies assignments in the region just six weeks into the semester.  Field trips that include research and diplomacy projects with partners in Gaza, the West Bank, and Jordan are canceled for the foreseeable future.

Classes are now being taught in an even more compassionate format, Mayo said. While politics, religion and culture, have always been discussed, it is now at the forefront as students are sharing their feelings about the war.

"Peace is something messy, it’s fragile and even harder to maintain, especially in this part of the world where both sides are deeply hurt, physically, mentally," Mayo said. "We believe what’s lacking in this region is some understanding and trust, and without that, you cannot continue the work that we do."

There is no other choice, said Tareq Abu Hamed, the Arava Insitute's executive director. He said many of the institute's diverse alumni have reached out to offer their support.

"The vast majority of people in this region just want peace," said Abu Hamed, a Palestinian from East Jerusalem. "The focus of this is clear to all of us seeking it here. We are living in a time where no one has the luxury to give up."

'We don’t necessarily know the way forward'

As the tragic events unfolded in the Middle East this week, Gili Getz,chair of the American Friends of Combatants for Peace, recalled a far more momentous occasion just six months ago in Tel Aviv.

It was the 18th annual Joint Memorial Ceremony held by the Combatants for Peace and The Parents Circle – Families Forum. It's touted as the "largest Israeli-Palestinian jointly organized peace event...a unique opportunity for Israelis and Palestinians to grieve together and stand strong in demanding an end to the ongoing violence." 

More than 15,000 people attended this year's event, gathering on the eve of Yom Hazikaron (Israeli Memorial Day), said Getz, including himself. He said more than 250,000 people watched a livestream and tens of thousands more online. Last year, 300,000 people watched the live broadcast event and more than 1 million people streamed it, Getz said.

Now, Getz, a photojournalist by trade, is calling on those same people, including fellow peace activists, to remain united at this uncertain time. Getz said he knows "it’s extremely difficult and fragile," and sometimes he "feels like peace is being held by duct tape." But Getz maintains there are people who are committed to the cause.

"We are asking our movement to hold our humanity first, count on our friendships and relationships to each other in the face of truly unbearable horror," Getz said. "It is so hard. We’re asking to commit to each other, even though we don’t necessarily know the way forward."

On Wednesday, Getz was among the nearly 200 people who gathered for a candlelight vigil at Washington Square Park in New York City. In addition to songs and prayers, attendees called for the de-escalation of tensions between Israel and Palestinian areas.

"The ultimate victory for peace is a politically negotiated agreement to have freedom for both the Israelis and Palestinians," Getz said. "Until then it will be horror, piles of bodies on the ground and blood in the river."

Shamil Idriss, CEO of Search for Common Ground, a peacebuilding group based in Washington, D.C., said inclusiveness is key and one thing people can do is reach out to those being directly affected and ask how they are doing.

"If you can bring yourself to do this across both communities, those who have strong ties to Israel and those with strong ties to Palestine, please amplify the voices of those who are suffering," Idriss said. "Let them be heard. Frankly, it is not only a service to them but to your own humanity."

'Our role is to build peace'

For some, the peace conversations are deeply personal to their everyday experiences.

When the violence erupted in Israel last Saturday, Aziz Abu Sarah, a Palestinian American who grew up in Jerusalem, and lives in Greenville, South Carolina, said the first person he talked to was his business partner, Scott Cooper, a Jewish American who lives in Chicago.

It would seem appropriate. Since 2009, they've co-owned Florida- and Israeli-based MEJDI Tours, which has led more than 20,000 travelers on "Dual Narrative" tours to Israel and Gaza led by guides who hail from either side of the conflict.

"Travelers leave with a much more complex understanding of the region," Abu Sarah said. "We've created a model where Israelis and Palestinians can co-exist, where they can sleep in the same hotel, and dine together. You hear about their hope, their fears and their anger. They even talk about possible peace solutions."

Last Saturday, Cooper got text messages from his tour team in Israel about the attack. He immediately told Abu Sarah. Both shared their fears, pain and frustrations about what was widely seen as the worst escalation in the Israel-Palestine conflict in at least 50 years.

"We consider each other family. I don't think of Scott as Jewish or the enemy, that's not what defines him and he feels the same way about me," said Abu Sarah about Cooper. "We rely on each other."

Abu Sarah said he and Cooper had an "intense, heartfelt talk" about the attack. They each called their families, friends and staff in Israel and Palestine to make sure everyone was safe. Former customers reached out to them concerned for their safety.

"My heart breaks across these lines, it’s a difficult and extremely complex situation," Cooper said.

When he was 10, Abu Sarah's older brother was killed after being beaten up in prison by Israeli soldiers in 1991. Abu Sarah said he held on to anger until he was 18, and that's when decided to learn Hebrew. He expected to be rejected in his class but he was welcomed and even his teacher spoke Arabic to him.

From then on, Abu Sarah, who lives part-time in South Carolina, said he would be more committed to "creating cross-cultural connections" between Israelis and Palestinians. He's written a book, "Crossing Boundaries - A Traveler’s Guide To World Peace," and was an executive director at the Center for World Religions, Diplomacy and Conflict Resolution at George Mason University in Virginia.

He hopes the cycle of violence in the Middle East will end sooner rather than later.

"Israel will never be safe unless Palestinians can be safe and Palestine will never be free without Israel’s help," Abu Sarah said. "We need each other."

Cooper said their goal is to remain supportive and show empathy and understanding.

"Our constant mission is to build as many bridges as we can," Cooper said. "Our role is to build peace."

The latest on the Israel-Hamas conflictAmericans leave Israel by air; Palestinians fleeing northern Gaza on foot, witness says

On the hunt for HamasThis Israeli town was Ground Zero for the Hamas attacks. How the police and military are trying to find the gunmen.